[COPY] Making a list and checking it a thousand times (Repost)
Welcome to the ADHD party, pal.
NOTE: This is an older post that I’m sending out again for my new readers who may not have gone through the backlist of posts. It’s something I’m trying out, because I’m all about trying new things. And this one is still very relevant. (Checking Substack off my to-do list.) This post is almost 2 years old (!) which seems crazy. I can’t believe I’ve been on here for two years. Time flies when you’re having fun!
I’m making a list of all the things I want to talk about on here. Today’s dilemma: which one to choose?! Do you make lists? I love them. I make lists for everything. What to write about here, what books I still have to write (i.e. which ones are knocking around in my head), grocery lists, cleaning lists, to do lists for the day/week/month/year, Christmas/birthday lists—you name it, I can write a list about it. There is an almost visceral satisfaction in crossing things off my lists. It makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something, instead of feeling like I never getting anything done that needs to be done. My lists prove I’m getting shit done. They also, of course, help keep me organized. Have you ever gone grocery shopping without a list? I just can’t. I get a bunch of crap I don’t need and invariably forget the stuff I really needed that sent me there in the first place. I have been to the grocery story three times in one day because I went without lists. It is not good for anyone involved.
I think my love of lists probably stems from some ADHD issues. I mean, my son had to get it from somewhere, right? And I know my dad had it, even though when he was younger they didn’t identify it as such. I’ve been seeing a lot of stuff lately about how ADHD presents in women, which can be different than men, but I think the need for lists or a journal or some kind of memory crutch is universal for all of us. I turned one of my sons onto lists last year when he was studying for exams. He was feeling overwhelmed with all that he had to do and wondering how to organize his time and I told him make a list; check things off when you do them. You’ll feel better. He actually did it (!) and learned that he liked it. Now he has a tiny little notebook he keeps nearby and makes lists of things he needs to do. A parenting win!
I guess I’m talking about ADHD. I’ll check that off the list. I have an app I love called Headway. I promise this is related. Headway breaks down non-fiction books into smaller bite-size, 10-15 minute summaries. I recently read a great summary of a book I will probably be buying, so I can read the whole thing. It’s called Taking Charge of Adult ADHD: Proven strategies to succeed at work, at home, and in relationships. I told you it was connected. Anyway, one of the things the author, Russel A. Barkley, PhD, says is that symptoms aren’t enough to get a diagnosis of ADHD, you have to be impaired by those symptoms. For example, ADHD impairs executive functions, which in turn affect things like time management, organization, and motivation. I’m doing an even shorter summary than Headway, but you get the drift. He goes on to say that one strategy to help is to divide projects into smaller tasks. Which equals what? Lists. I’m impaired when I go to the grocery store because I can’t remember what I need, so I break it down into a list. Simple. He also recommends surrounding yourself with reminders and notes about things that you have to do. Clearly my brain worked this out before reading this book summary, but it was nice to have the validation that I was doing it right, lol.
Another way I use lists is when I plot a book and create characters. I have these wonderful worksheets from Angela Knight and Debra Dixon that I received when I took plotting workshops with them years ago. Deb is the grandmaster of GMC, goal, motivation and conflict, the three main ingredients that make your characters tick. Her worksheets are simple tables that help you figure out your characters’ GMC, both internal and external. I highly recommend her book on the subject, GMC: Goal, Motivation and Conflict—The Building Blocks of Good Fiction. And Angela gave me worksheets on romantic conflicts. Again, it’s a simple table, and it asks questions like what was their first impression of each other? What changed that? and a whole series of other questions that really lets you break down and get into why your characters are attracted to one another and how they can get to the HEA. I use both sets of worksheets religiously when I’m plotting and writing my books.
Favorite things this week (other than Headway)":
I got some new earrings from Larissa Loden. Mine both say badass, but you can mix and match. I almost go the fuck earrings, but I live in a small southern town, where it might not go over so well. You can get other kinds too, like cheese or fries or bitch or queer. Whatever floats your boat. I need some more validation, so I got badass. I got the bracelet version of this pin for myself earlier this year. It says Worlds Okayest Mom. It cracks me up. I wear it everyday to remind myself I don’t have to perfect all the time. Only the pin is still available, unfortunately, but it’s still awesome.
If you haven’t hear of Luckyscent before, just thank me now. You can order just about every fragrance under the sun here, but more importantly you can get samples of most of the fragrances. This is my jam. I burn out on a fragrance after a while, and then I’m left with half a bottle sitting around. These samples are high quality perfume in those tiny little tubes and they last FOREVER because you only need to apply a small amount. I have a collection of them I rotate. Plus, a bottle of some of these can run you hundreds of dollars and the samples are between $5-$25. My favorites so far: Baccarat Rouge 540 Extrait and Cuir Andalou.
And last, but not least, my editing website is live! I couldn’t have done it without this video. He walked me through it step by step and to my complete and utter shock and delight, it worked! I did it! Anyway, check out my new website, and if you’re thinking of creating your own website, check out the video.
Finally, I love quotes. Love, love, love them. I have books of quotations filling my bookshelves. So I’m going to finish with one. Today’s quote:
“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” Henry David Thoreau
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